Beanery Online Literary Magazine

July 27, 2011

A Barhop Who Lived in Lagrange

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BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

A BARHOP WHO LIVED IN LAGRANGE

G. David Schwartz

A barhop who lived in Lagrange

Decided that his life was quite strange

And sipping a beer

He said “It’s quite clear,

That no one looks forward to change”

~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

ADDITIONAL READING:

A Beanery Writers Group Story in Photographs

Which Lou Loses?

Wait Until the Coffee’s Poured

July 23, 2011

The Bludgeoned Skull

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BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

THE BLUDGEOUNED SKULL

G. David Schwartz

The bludgeoned skull,

The face raped by torture

Which gleamed like dark roads

Against the window legend

Saw you jump and hurl

All objects at hand

Towards a (more…)

July 20, 2011

Mixed-Up Mergatroid

BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

MIXED-UP MERGATROID

Norma Leary

     Because it was raining cats, bats, dogs, frogs, and unsung rug-bugs in Scootertoot Circle, Bow knew he couldn’t play outdoors this Saturday afternoon.

     As he was wondering what to do on this rainy day, his dog, Scuttlemutt, ran to the door and began barking.

     “Someone’s coming,” Bow thought. Although Scuttle refused to talk, get a job to earn his food, and spent most days sleeping or going in and out, he was great at announcing visitors.

     Sure enough, Bow heard ‘rat, tap, rap-a-tap-tap.’ “Knock, knock, who’s there?” he called.

     “Boo.”

     “Boo who?” asked Bow.

     “Quit crying and let your rocket-rider regal-alien come in. My waterproof skin is getting water spotted and might shrink,” was his answer.

     “Hi Mergatroid, what’s up?” asked Bow, opening the door.

     Mergatroid put on his pouter outer space face and said, “I used to be far, far up until our Starazoid King saucer-shipped me here to study and write about your Untied States history.”

      Needing to correct Merg’s state of mind, Bow said, “Cool it, Merg. We’re United, not (more…)

July 16, 2011

The Writer’s Dilemma

BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

THE WRITER’S DILEMMA

Joe F. Stierheim

Number of words; number of pages;

how much is a novel worth?

What value the symbols on the page?

What is the measure:

the likes of the market’

the current style?

Too long for some, too (more…)

July 13, 2011

Pinto Man

BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

PINTO MAN

Mark Sliwa

     The television and VCR were on the blink. I’m a firm believer of selling things while they still work or move. A newspaper ad and I was $700 richer. 

     Three newspaper days later my brother, Brian, said, “Hey, look at this. A 1977 Alfa Romeo Alfetta GTV. And it’s only $700.” 

     God forbid keeping that money in my pocket. At the time, my brother and I shared an apartment in Raleigh, North Carolina and the vehicle for sale was only one town away. Being a mechanic, he convinced me to take a look.

     One should always be wary of vintage Italian cars. Remember what Fiat stands for: (more…)

July 9, 2011

Testimony of a Rich Miser

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BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

TESTIMONY OF A RICH MISER

Ernest Williamson III

though you loved me
in the inner sanctum
of wayward kisses
moist (more…)

July 6, 2011

A Beanery Writers Group Homage to Bob Sanzi

BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

A BEANERY WRITERS GROUP HOMAGE TO BOB SANZI

Beanery Writers Group

I looked for your car when I arrived at the June 24, 2010, Beanery Writers Meeting.

            I hadn’t heard…You were gone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

     Bob, you left too soon. Some of us needed to learn more from you. It’s hard to believe that you only joined us on June 12, 2010. At your last meeting, June 10, 2011, you were so excited about the new car Nancy bought and allowed you to drive to the meeting.

      We all heard your gruff, commanding, voice, and experienced your unique bombastic manner, at the first Beanery Writers Group meetings you attended. Some of us questioned whether we could tolerate you. You were opinionated, certain you were right, and felt you had to talk and talk and talk to push your point, even after everyone had “gotten it.” You were so certain you were right.

     Your identity was enmeshed in cars—you were quite animated and willing to share a multitude of car stories. After all, you were a car guy who even amused us by turning a prompt on the Kentucky Derby into a car piece. You didn’t seem to understand that (more…)

July 4, 2011

Red, White and Blue Dreams

BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

RED, WHITE AND BLUE DREAMS

Diana Reh Hunt

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Red, white and blue dreams

born in sandbox games,

rocked to stars ‘n stripes lullabies

in cradles of freedoms to come.

Young hopes fly high on tire swings

when the dreamers’ smiles outshine the sun.

 

Red, white and blue dreams

come from family farm to (more…)

July 2, 2011

Tourism in Brownsville, Pennsylvania

BEANERY ONLINE LITERARY MAGAZINE

TOURISM IN BROWNSVILLE, PENNSYLVANIA

Mark Sliwa

NOTE: This event occurred in 2000.

     The plain white flyer came in the mail, folded twice and secured by a staple. It was an invitation to the Western Pennsylvania Machine Gun Association’s spring shoot. $5.00 admission and they’d have hotdogs and Pepsi too. Reservations required. I made the phone call and signed up for two thinking this would be a great lunch date for my girlfriend.

     Brownsville, Pennsylvania, was the site for this festival. Sadly, it is a city that has long been in the dire straits of a poor economy. Getting off the highway and into downtown, plywood panels cover many windows on Main Street’s business district. Destitute figures lean in shady doorways. The architecture itself still inspires. Before the collapse of the steel industry this must have been a vibrant place. Time does march on though and some places don’t keep step.

     The flyer’s directions said go south down Main Street, then at the edge of town go three clicks further, and make a left on an unmarked dirt road. It looked like we were headed straight into a DMZ. The dirt road was there and pulling out of the entrance was rural America’s staff car of choice: the ratty old pickup truck. Two sketchy looking occupants were in the cab; local security I assumed. A metal tag adorned the truck’s grill: Western Pennsylvania Machine Gun Association. They must be (more…)